How the Film “Wonder” is Commercializing Facial Difference

People in a movie theater, sitting in seats. The photo is from behind so you can only see the backs of heads.

As a writer and activist, there’s no feeling quite like finding out a professor at a well known university used my work in their class to start a discussion about disfigurement and equality for individuals living with physical differences. I received an email from the professor with follow-up questions from her students: What was it like to undergo surgery that altered my appearance? Did I think I would’ve been conventionally beautiful had I not been born with a craniofacial disorder? The email concluded with the professor asking if I had read Wonder by R.J. Palacio a book about a young boy named Auggie with Treacher Collins syndrome and praising the story for its perspective.

Perhaps the professor’s inquiry shouldn’t have been too shocking, because aside from the commercialization of disfigurement and facial differences by the entertainment industry, disfigurement is an issue not many people are exposed to. Those of us living with facial differences or disfigurement are often only portrayed as something to be feared or pitied.

This issue is prevalent in Wonder — now a forthcoming movie based on the book. As part of the film’s promotion, Lionsgate is running a marketing campaign to promote the movie and its message of “choosing kind.” Part of their #CHOOSEKIND campaign allows classrooms across the country to become “Certified Kind,” meaning children complete tasks and are rewarded for their acts of kindness. Students can design a t-shirt portraying what inclusion and kindness look like, with the winner earning $150 and the opportunity to have their design printed on shirts at GAP Kids. Another challenge asks classrooms to watch a video by the makers of Wonder (none of whom have craniofacial conditions) and identify what principles they live by. For this challenge, winning students are rewarded with an advance screening of the movie at their local theater. The final challenge is a kindness jar, where teachers put a marble in a jar whenever students perform acts of kindness. For this challenge, five classrooms win a $50 pizza gift card and $500 donation to a charity of the winner’s choice.

While I can appreciate the concept behind encouraging kindness, rewarding individuals for being nice — especially being nice to people with facial differences and physical differences — shouldn’t need to be encouraged. It should be expected.

In addition to rewarding students with prizes, CCA Kids (Children’s Craniofacial Association), an organization that has partnered with Wonder, is offering to bring a “Real-Life Auggie” to schools across the country. To do this, they’re enlisting children with craniofacial conditions and facial disfigurements to go into schools or to contact children at schools via Skype or letters. On the organization’s website, it states, “We are contacted by more and more Elementary and Middle schools who want to be connected with a ‘Real-Life Auggie, … Many receive standing ovations at the assemblies they are part of when they visit the schools.”

Even though directors were unable to find a child living with Treacher Collins, or even just a facial difference, to play the role of Auggie in the film adaptation, they’re now asking children to attend schools and share their stories. This desire to capitalize on the commercialization of this condition is sickening.  

Campaigning to send “Real-Life Auggies” or “real life children with disfigurements/craniofacial differences” to schools across the country defeats everything this book is supposed to stand for. Instead of promoting inclusion, it further objectifies people living with these conditions, and portrays them as “other.” It presents individuals with disfigurements not as equals, but as someone to be pitied. It’s commercialized inspiration porn, at best. Not to mention, a “real-life Auggie” sounds like an exotic animal you’d see displayed somewhere, not a child living with a medical condition. This kind of language has real consequences for real people.

I’ve experienced these consequences firsthand. Ever since Wonder came out and I began writing about my own experience living with a craniofacial disorder, I’m frequently compared to Auggie and told to read Wonder. But Wonder is a fictional story, written by an author who has zero personal experience with the subject matter.

After a middle school student read an essay I wrote, she did a report on Wonder and compared me to the main character, saying I must have insight into what it’s like being “deformed.” Of course I have insight. I’m real. And so are the kids these organizations want to send into classrooms as an example of kindness. To be compared to a fictional character and have my experience and my insight come second to an author with no personal experience on the issue is appalling. Spreading kindness may have been the goal of these campaigns, but ultimately it’s the celebration of ignorance that was achieved.

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Rooted in Rights exists to amplify the perspectives of the disability community. Blog posts and storyteller videos that we publish and content we re-share on social media do not necessarily reflect the opinions or values of Rooted in Rights nor indicate an endorsement of a program or service by Rooted in Rights. We respect and aim to reflect the diversity of opinions and experiences of the disability community. Rooted in Rights seeks to highlight discussions, not direct them. Learn more about Rooted In Rights

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When Emotional Support Becomes Unintended Gaslighting

Photo of the author and her mother smiling for the camera, on a street in front of a restaurant.

Gaslighting is a psychological term used to describe a type of emotional and psychological abuse. Rooted in manipulation, it refers to someone’s attempt to alter someone else’s reality. The term stems from the 1938 stage play and 1944 film, Gaslight – a story in which a husband systematically convinces his wife she’s mentally unstable. In the film, the woman begins to question her own thoughts, feelings, instincts, and even her sanity. Gaslighting doesn’t only affect those in marital relationships, though. This type of abuse can affect anyone. In fact, people with physical differences are often victims of gaslighting by those intending to offer comfort and support. As someone with Crouzon syndrome, a craniofacial condition that affects the shape and growth of my head, I’ve experienced this firsthand.

At the very heart of gaslighting is the fact that individuals are often shamed for speaking up, with the abuse often manifesting itself in comments like:

“They’re not pointing at you. They’re pointing at what’s behind you.”

“Don’t be so sensitive, they’re only staring at you because you’re so pretty.”

“They didn’t mean it like that. You always take things so personally.”

Sadly, this type of treatment is typical for many living with disfigurement.

Because of my appearance, I spent much of my adolescence struggling to accept the appearance of my face. Some days, I didn’t want to be seen by anyone, because being seen too often meant being judged. In many ways, I spent my life at the mercy of strangers. To make matters worse, my loved ones didn’t know how to help, and in an effort to comfort me, would often deny prejudicial occurrences. This never made me feel better, though. It made me feel misunderstood.

When I was in public – shopping and running errands with my mother – strangers would often stare and make rude comments about my face. I was always left feeling small and insignificant, wondering why I was the only one who saw how inappropriate this kind of treatment was.

“Can we go?” I’d ask my mother. “People are being rude and I’m not in the mood.” Sometimes I would deliberately raise my voice, speaking loud enough for the onlookers to hear me. I thought maybe if I called them out on their behavior, they’d understand their actions were hurtful. But they rarely got the message.

“They’re just admiring how cute you look today,” my mother would say with a smile, as she examined items on a shelf.

I’d almost always roll my eyes, because my mother and I both knew why I was being stared at, and being cute had nothing to do with it.

My mother wasn’t the only person to respond to these situations in this manner. Friends and family members also chalked up my experiences to my sensitivity and assured me that the teasing and mocking wasn’t even occurring, that it was all in my head. Though I knew they had the best of intentions, that they were simply trying to spare my feelings, it hurt. But that’s what gaslighting is: It’s dismissing the victim’s questions or feelings. It’s denying events occurred or pretending to forget the way something happened, belittling the situation entirely.

Much of this often unintentional abuse stems from the fact that being the target of public bullying or harassment, or witnessing someone else experience it, can be uncomfortable and difficult to navigate. But if you’re ever faced with the task of comforting a friend or loved one, do your best to just listen. When it comes to offering support, don’t deny the victim’s feelings. Instead, ask what they need and go from there.

As an adult, my mother and I talk openly about the situations we experienced together. She apologizes, noticing the ways in which she inadvertently minimized my feelings and denied my experiences. She simply didn’t know how to respond. As a mother, it hurt her to see her child upset, so she handled the situation the best way she knew how.

These days, when my mother and I are out shopping together, I use a code phrase to indicate my discomfort. “I feel like a celebrity,” I’ll tell her, when strangers are staring too intensely, and I feel like crawling out of my skin. My mother, ready to get me out of any situation, immediately stops what she’s doing and asks if I want to leave. Sometimes, I take her up on it. Other times, we just stare back at the onlookers together – our own little way of taking the power back.


Rooted in Rights exists to amplify the perspectives of the disability community. Blog posts and storyteller videos that we publish and content we re-share on social media do not necessarily reflect the opinions or values of Rooted in Rights nor indicate an endorsement of a program or service by Rooted in Rights. We respect and aim to reflect the diversity of opinions and experiences of the disability community. Rooted in Rights seeks to highlight discussions, not direct them. Learn more about Rooted In Rights

Click here to pitch a blog post to Rooted in Rights.